A Letter to My Inner Child: Releasing Perfectionism & Embracing Creativity

There was a time when I believed that everything I created had to be perfect. That my voice had to sound flawless before I dared to sing. That my art had to be extraordinary to be worth making. That if I wasn’t the best, then maybe I shouldn’t even try.

I didn't realize then that these beliefs weren’t mine to begin with. They were planted in my mind by experiences, by societal expectations, by the voices of adults who once dismissed the wild, untamed joy of a child simply expressing herself.

But the truth is, every child is born knowing how to create freely. We don’t start life questioning our worth. We don’t hesitate before dancing, painting, or singing. We do it because it feels good, because it’s natural. But somewhere along the way, that freedom is taken from us.

For me, I can trace it back to my childhood wounds—the times when I was taught to be "good" and "quiet," the moments when my joy was overlooked or my efforts were criticized. Even in my early adulthood, as I reread an old diary entry from 2011, I saw the self-doubt lingering in my words. I had written about trying to sing Celtic music, something I loved deeply, but instead of celebrating my voice, I criticized it. I dismissed myself before anyone else could.

I now see my inner child in those words. A little girl who just wanted to sing, but instead was told, you’re not good enough.

And so, I wrote her a letter.

My 2011 diary entry - I was painfully critical of myself, a projection of an unhealed childhood wound

Dear Little Me,

I see you. I see the way your heart lights up when you sing, when you create, when you dream of all the beautiful things you want to bring into this world. I see how your soul dances when you hear music, how your voice wants to rise and join in, how your hands long to shape and build and express.

And I also see how I silenced you. How I dimmed your light with criticism, with doubt, with that voice that was never truly yours but one you learned from a world that told you you had to be perfect to be worthy. I see all the times I told you you’re not good enough, when all you wanted was to play, to create, to be free.

I am so sorry.

I am sorry for making you feel like you had to be someone else to be loved. I am sorry for dismissing your joy because I thought it wasn’t valuable unless it was "perfect." I am sorry for shrinking your dreams, for keeping you in the shadows when all you ever wanted was to shine.

But today, that changes.

Today, I hold your hand and whisper: You are safe. You are free to create, to sing, to paint, to dream wildly. You don’t have to be perfect—you only have to be you. Your voice matters. Your art matters. Your joy is reason enough to do what you love.

I promise to never silence you again. I promise to let you play, to let you make mistakes, to let you be messy and imperfect and still so incredibly loved. I promise to stand beside you as we reclaim every dream we once thought was too far away.

Sing, my love. Laugh. Dance. Create. Be wild, be free, be you.

With all my love,Your Older, Wiser, and Finally Awakening Self

How to Heal Perfectionism and Reconnect with Your Inner Child

If this letter resonated with you, maybe you also have an inner child waiting to be heard. Maybe you’ve held back your creativity out of fear of judgment. Maybe you’ve been silencing the most beautiful, joyful parts of yourself without even realizing it.

The good news? You can reconnect. You can heal. You can set yourself free.

Here are a few ways to start:

1. Give Yourself Permission to Create for the Joy of It

Not everything has to be productive. Not every hobby has to become a skill. Let yourself create just because it feels good—sing, dance, paint, write—without worrying about the outcome.

2. Rewrite the Old Narrative

Every time you hear that critical voice telling you "you're not good enough," pause. Ask yourself: Whose voice is this? Where did I first hear this message? Then, replace it with a new, loving truth: I am worthy just as I am. My creativity is valid. I deserve to express myself.

3. Journal Your Thoughts & Feelings

Journaling is a powerful way to uncover subconscious beliefs that are still affecting you today. Write to your inner child. Ask her what she needs. Let her express her sadness, her joy, her longing. And then, give her what she never received.

4. Take Small, Courageous Steps

If you've been holding back from something you love—whether it's singing, writing, painting, or dancing—start small. Hum a song while you cook. Sketch in a notebook with no expectations. Move your body just for fun. The more you allow yourself to create freely, the more you heal.

5. Speak to Yourself with Love

Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a child who is learning. Be gentle. Be encouraging. Replace criticism with kindness. Every time you create, celebrate yourself, no matter how small the step.

Your Inner Child is Waiting for You

If you’ve ever felt the weight of perfectionism, if you’ve ever held yourself back from doing what you love, know this: It is not too late to reclaim your joy. Your inner child is still there, waiting for you to take her hand and tell her that she is safe, that she is loved, and that she is finally free to be who she was always meant to be.

So go. Sing, dance, create, and let yourself shine.